Haiku

Sitting on the floor sippin’ on my second cup of coffee while listening to Ledisi, and waiting on my next door neighbor to finish taking a shower. Only because I want there to be some hot water left. Yesterday was the holiday and all I did was lay on the couch and finish watching my beloved Gilmore Girls series. I didn’t necessarily talk to anyone. I just wanted to be left alone. Meanwhile my mother tried to lowkey manipulate me into going to my grandma’s house for a couple of hours... I wasn’t going for it. I didn’t feel like putting on a facade or being in that particular space. Which is my main issue with Thanksgiving. I don’t talk to my family on a regular, semi or even annual basis... I definitely don’t wanna deal with them on a national holiday. Is that wrong? Perhaps. But, I feel the way I feel. Anyway. I just laid on the couch in my new favorite blanket being unbothered. Eventually I went to my bed and forced myself to go to sleep because I didn’t know what else to do with myself. 

While I laid there my mom kept popping into my room wanting to talk and asking me random questions. 🙄 Eventually she left me be and I went to sleep. Of course I woke up several times. Now that I’m officially up... I feel some type of way. I still dunno what to do with myself. I’m sad and my spirit is feeling it heavily. There are so many things I need to do and phone calls that I need to make. But everything seems so daunting and overwhelming at the moment. I’m just doing my best to take my own advice, which is: day by day and step by step.