When your best isn’t enough. What do you do? Give it to God. Or at least that what my mama said. I really be trippin’ over life…
Like one minute you’re cool and then BAM! 💥 the next minute your whole life changes in an instant. I think about my life a lot. What I mean to people, what they mean to me, my purpose, and everything I’ve been through this far. I’ve come an incredibly long way. To see my growth is amazing AND for other people to see/acknowledge my growth is amazing as well. Although these growing pains hurt, I’m in awe with myself.
I’m staying true to my word. I know what I’m worth and I don’t want to settle. God built me different. Learning that I’m an empath makes so much more sense to me as I get older. After tapping into my vulnerability via therapy. AND being in a relationship… I’ve had to learn the sensitive spots of my heart, mind, and spirit. So with all that… I’m a sensitive hot mess mixed with empathy. I’m dealing with my own issues on top of feeling everyone else’s emotions. It’s crazy! I was today years old when I realized it. Lol.
Imagine how heavy all of this feels on a daily basis. I’ve come to terms that solace, quietness, and sleep is how I manage. Sometimes I’ll come home and won’t turn on anything. I’ll just sit in silence or even drive in silence. Not all the time, but, it’s becoming more often and I’m okay with it. In this moment I am doing alright. However, I know some days will be better than others. I also know that healing takes time. I’ve given so much of myself away in this particular relationship and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It has just taught me that I’m able to love. And although, I’ve given alotta myself to someone… that just means that I’m ready to love even harder the next go round. I just need to make sure that it’s reciprocated how I need it to be. In the midst of my mind’s chaos, I’m still processing… Life man… it be life’n…
love. all ways. always.
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